You guys I could just cry with happiness. I was just saying to The Beard yesterday – I can honestly say, for the first time in… Idk how long, that this was a GOOD month. Like top to bottom, overall GOOD month. I’ve had good days and weeks in the last year of course, but I really feel like I looked back on those months and overall felt disappointed or insecure or otherwise bad about them. October, you beautiful birth month, you.

I feel like I’ve emerged. My head is above water. I can see clearly and feel deeply again. I just feel ~better. I feel good. I had a great month. My heart is so full. If you want an inside look at my emotional state – I started crying at Zumba last week because I just felt so good and was so happy to be there. I’m gonna try to blame some of that on pregnancy, but I know a big part of it is just the changes and progress and learning I’ve finally tackled. I feel like me, but a newer me. So sorry if this GBOMB comes off a little rose-colored. At least I’m not a hot mess raincloud anymore!!!!

Good

• I decided to be brave and finally do something I’ve been wanting to do for a long time – I’m going to teach a planning/planner class!!!! I’ve been thinking of little else, honestly, and I can’t remember the last time I was this excited and invested in something. I’ve posted about it on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram, but if you’re in the Utah County area and you’re interested in attending the class in late November please email me.
• My girl Brissa started a YouTube channel, which I love and makes me want to be braver and to get better at YouTube.
• Did you catch that I’m back in Zumba classes?!!! I can only stay for about 3/4 of the class, and I have to sit out one or two songs when I can tell I’m getting tired and sloppy. But I’m doing it and it feels so amazing.
• My birthday was awesome. Especially because I made The Beard let me buy most of my own presents. After doing KonMari method my shopping is so different, and I am more satisfied with shopping than ever.
• I have found a few lip colors that I’m ~really into, which is huge for me. I’m not a big lip person but I want to get into it more. The NYX lingerie and soft matte lip creams are really exciting me right now. It’s fun to try new makeup things!!!
• We’re going on a quick Vegas trip with The Beard’s family this weekend and I have Gumption by Nick Offerman on audiobook ready to rock and some birthday money to spend. YASSSSSSSSSS.
• THE CHICAGO CUBS ARE IN THE WORLD SERIES
• Reese’s latest thing is “talking” on the “phone” so she grabs a toy phone or more often a tv remote and walks around saying “Hewo? Ajaja? Oh no! Bye!” for like hours a day. I freaking love it so much.
• I read so many great books this month and they were all self-help lol my Goodreads is probably like “Ummmm should we send someone to check on her?”
• The Beard suggested a Harry Potter marathon leading up to Halloween – of his own free will and choice.
• I was feeling MEH about my hair so my mom gave me some layers and I got a few new products to try and now I’m feeling totally rejuvenated!
• We have reached pigtail-status!!!!! They’re little and goofy but I’m obsessed with them!!!!

Bad

• I would really love if there were like 2 more weeks of October because it was bomb AF. I’m a little bummed it’s almost over.
• Reese had what we think? was a night terror last week and it was the wOOOooooOOOOooooorst. Her sleeping/nap schedule has been disastrous this month so I had a lot of fatigued days and 3 am Google sessions like “toddler cry-it-out” and “18 month sleep regression” and “NSYNC backstage pics.” Things are looking better, at least.
• Reese also fell off our bed and scraped her nose. It wasn’t deep but it looked pretty gnarly and The Beard called her Tyrion Lannister all week.
• Reese woke up from one of her naps and tried to change her own dirty diaper. That’s all I’m going to say.
• I still can’t figure out how to curl my hair with a flat iron, despite countless YouTube tutorials
• I didn’t read the designated books for either of the two book clubs I follow.
• You know how they joke about the previous versions of the iPhone falling apart when the new ones come out? K but it’s literally happening to me.

On My Brain

• Is a 7 Plus too big for me? I am super interested in the camera and the increased screen size. But I also have little hands and that’s quite an upsize. I keep going back and forth.
• BYU responding to the study on sexual assault made me so happy. I was prepared for nothing to change except possibly awareness. This is actually a really big step for BYU and I think it reflects the overall attitude and willingness of the Church at large to respond and change positively to modern challenges. There’s still a long way to go. I mean, they still haven’t retracted the statement that “there isn’t a market” for caffeinated beverages. K.
• After reading “So You’ve Been Publicly Shamed” I’ve been way more aware of the way we react to news and events in the media. Generally I think we react too powerfully and too quickly. Did you notice how quickly the Ken Bone thing spiraled?? I also felt so much pain when I read about the Subway kid – the one who everyone thought poisoned that cop. It was heartbreaking to see that he was innocent and everyone was so hardcore and even violently against him, because I remember reading the original article and thinking “Ugh what an awful person he should go to jail forever.” We really need to take a breath, wait a beat, and reserve our judgment. We don’t know everything. And sometimes we don’t need to know everything.
• I just finished my latest podcast obsession: Accused. My MIL suggested it to me because we both loved Serial and Criminal. It’s quick and fascinating – perfect for a road trip, binge, or weekend chores.
• I’ve already started hunting for potential nursing bras, although without much hope. I never figured out something that ~really worked for me last time, and I want something better this time around.
• None of the new fall shows have stuck with me. This Is Us was too emotional and I’m not really into dramas. The Good Place was ok but I just didn’t care to keep going. I know it sounds boring but all I ever want to do is watch The Office and Parks & Rec and Arrested Development on loop. Is that bad? I’ve realized I just don’t care.

The last handful of October will be spent in Vegas with family and then celebrating Halloween!!! And November has a lot of great things in store, too. 🙂